Courting a Gymmie - Part 5

Now & Then

(Written at 23:35 hrs, 24 Feb 2010)

Today has been a tiring day for both of us. He had a multi-disciplinary inspection team visiting from his Divisional office and I had to face some unprecedented faults just a day prior to my safety audit.

These days time moves at super fast speed, life has become too routine to live. We are still living in different cities and our relation is still in the courtship phase. We are yet to reach the formal stage where we shall enjoy the liberty of referring to each other directly; a stage after which I will be able to mention Proper nouns instead of Pronouns in articles of this variety. One major turning point in recent past has been his transition from a probationer to ADME. So, right now both of us are dealing with our jobs (read responsibilities and associated constraints) in full swing. I enjoy certain gender based freedom in my office, by the virtue of which I usually get free before dinner time (at max). However, his job is of round the clock nature and he doesn’t get liberties like me. Nowadays, I am not able to track when the day starts and when its time to sleep again. Time keeps ticking away and is always less than the required amount. We steal moments here and there to talk a little. He hasn’t even set up his ‘grihasthi’ and though there is another very caring senior at this place, yet I often get worried about him. The time we get to spend with each other has become all the more unpredictable.

In fact, even this post was not supposed to be written right now. Finally, after this tiring and trying day at work today, both of us had found some time of solace on phone and just as we were starting to recount our experiences, a hooter started wailing in background. Obviously he had to go to check and obviously I am waiting for him to return, at least just to ensure that he gets some precious hours of a good sleep. There cannot be a more fitting conclusion to this series because the mere conceptualization of this series happened because he had to leave for Jamalpur last week (at a day’s notice), to attend C’day. Courting a Gymmie, still remains to be as beautiful, as pleasant, as uncertain, as understanding and as loving as ever. And, even though the pace of life has changed immensely (he is not even based in Jamalpur any longer), yet the basic essence of the courtship is the same. This unique courtship (between him, me, Gym (and railways)) started many years ago and has become a part of our identities itself.

This series was started as a method to commemorate the Gymkhana angle of our relationship and is dedicated to him and all his fellow Gymmies.

Thanks Bhagwaanji for blessing us thus,

Thanks to him for being with me always,

Thanks to the great and unparalleled culture of Jamapur,

And thanks to all those made it through all these autobiographical chapters about issues totally unrelated (and unimportant) to them.

Once again happy life to both of us!

May God bless us.

Courting a Gymmie - Part 4

Of Uncertainties and Stability

One of the first lessons I learnt in this courtship was of uncertainty and unpredictability. It started even before he left for Jamalpur for the first time. I remember him giving all of us a treat to celebrate his selection in SCRA, just a day prior to his scheduled departure. Mind you, we were already a couple by then, so we met some one hour before the scheduled time and were having general discussions. I enquired about his journey and got to know that it was scheduled for the next day. After the treat, as we departed, I wished him ‘all the best’ and ‘happy journey’. Next day, I was so surprised to receive his call at a time when he should have been travelling as per my knowledge. He told me that he would be boarding a train the next day. Also, his passes arrived only at the very last moment. Even though so much of uncertainty was associated with his first journey itself, still it did not ring any bells in my ears. (Sometimes I wonder whether love is just blind or deaf and dumb too).

During his initial days as a firstie, I attributed all the uncertainties in our life to the dear dear seniors and their moods, in addition to the customs of the Gym (A few examples of these doubts will include activities like, when to expect or not to expect a call, when to expect or not to expect some time to sleep (for him), when to expect or not to expect a unit or a health banana ka session). However, as time passed, I started realising that this volatility was there to stay, at least as long as they didn’t become the senior most. And as more years went by, I have finally come to term with the fact that this unpredictable nature of life is an integral and inseparable part of railways. (Sometimes, it takes one’s own experience to learn).

To substantiate whatever I have stated above, let me quote few incidents which changed my perspective. One of the earliest times when he planned to visit me at my college, until he boarded the train, I was not sure if we were meeting the next day or not. It so happened, that after a lot of ‘mutual missing-missing feeling’ he finally decided that he shall come over to my city for a weekend. The plan was set, I had done my bit of work as well; like finalising what hangouts to visit, what to gift (and when) and even what to wear J (I am a systematic girl, I know). He had done his bit of work, had got the requisite passes and tickets and EQs. All was well, and we were both in a very excited mode, really looking forward to the weekend. However, as the Monday approached, some news reached him (and thus me); they had a VL scheduled for the coming Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Now, he was still a firstie, and though even firsties are allowed to bunk regular sessions and workshop, but bunking a VL is quite unthinkable. It was as if someone had poured huge amount of ice cold water over all our immediate dreams. Still, he was hopeful and I crossed my fingers.

He presented his case to a senior. However, there was yet another twist in the situation. Going by the official stats, he has never disclosed my identity (or even confirmed my existence) to anyone at Gym except his batchmates. So now the situation was that, he told his senior that he really had to go outstation on that weekend for such and such reason which was very important. (Funny scenario, personally I prefer to believe that had he disclosed about my existence, convincing the senior would had been much simpler) But the senior was very supportive and understanding of whatever reason he had provided. (Till date, I have a huge amount of respect for this particular senior J). Though the senior suggested a probable method of escape, yet he advised him against it. (It was a very brave step given his circumstances). Now, we spent the next 4 days in a lot of speculation and when on Friday evening one of my seniors enquired about his visit, all I had to say was “Not sure, he is trying his best”. Finally, he did manage to come and only after he was onboard it got confirmed that we were meeting the next day :)

Truly, this was just the beginning. Almost all our visits thereof; in any city, on any occasion and under any circumstances, this uncertainty has been a very integral part of all. What keeps the hope going is the fact that almost each of these uncertain meetings happened due to divine intervention. It is as if Bhagwaanji tests our patience and love every time before blessing us thus. And this fact has instilled our faith in our relation like nothing else. On any given day, under any circumstances, we always know at the bottom of our hearts that Bhagwaanji is with us; after all Bhagwaanji only brought us together and has been taking care of us.

It is very strange, but the fact remains that nothing has made our life n courtship more stable than this uncertainty itself. The faith that come hail, come storm, come what may, we were, are and shall always stay together….. forever. The good thing about such unpredictable moments is that once one has stood up to such unexpected turns of life, a feeling of satisfaction and trust begins to seep in; - deeper than our imagination. In my heart, I know that whatever might be the reason for any untoward situation/ circumstance or last moment change of plans, given a choice he would have avoided it just for our sake, just because of love. And when such an understanding begins to develop, obviously the relation reaches a different level altogether, as it has happened to us.

Ohh my! I guess I am deviating from the topic. From courting a Gymmie, I started a monologue on love and understanding. But, I guess, this is what courting a Gymmie is all about. It’s about unconditional love and endless understanding. It’s about expecting nothing and giving everything (That in fact is the crux of any companionship). Talking about the initial four years of our courtship, (‘Our’ referring to him, myself and this culture he had adopted), we were blessed with umpteen numbers of memorable moments, enough memories to fill us with happiness till eternity…… and all this can accredited to him, our love, his Gym and of course Bhagwaanji.

At the end of these 4 years, he became a SAM. Technically, he is no longer a Gymmie, life has shifted gears for him (and automatically for me). And if we were riding a superfast express earlier, all of a sudden we find ourselves onboard a roller coaster. All in all life has been good………….no this is an understatement, life has been simply superb. Courting a Gymmie is so much fun and even the uncertain moments add on to the stability of the relation. Didn’t I say that everything is very different from what is generally and easily understood by the ordinary janta. :P

Courting a Gymmie - Part 3

"Our" First ‘Club-Day’

Okay, so going back to the time, post first DP vacs, life at Jamalpur had taken an academic turn and time after morning assembly was spent in attending classes by VLs. As the first semester approached a climax, I became aware of another interesting aspect about IRIMEE. Even though the mid-sems were held at Jamalpur, these people had to travel to Ranchi for their end semester. (Seriously, an incredible system!) . This was when I first came to know about a ‘Saloon’.

Now, in any ordinary college, end-sem is usually followed by a sem break (n only the nerds stay back at college to hone their skills further), but at Jamalpur the case was different. I came to term with the fact that he and his whole community were not mere college students. They were trainees of railways since day 1, and B.Tech was just a part of their training. (Moreover, they were being paid for it as well.) Thus, life post end-sem took yet another turn, I understood the meaning (and importance) of ‘Shop sessions’. Every morning, it was the turn one of the batchmates to punch cards at the workshop. And as the next sem was about to start, some new terms were added to my Gym vocabulary; Shop notes, diary, presentation and Director’s interview.

By now, I was also back at my college from my winter break. And since the seniors had become somewhat more lenient towards the firsties and since we had become more open to each other, I was looking forward to more heartfelt conversations with him. However, as is customary to the invisible relation I have had with Gymkhana, I was once again in for a surprise. His b’day was fast approaching and I was busy making plans for the same, had even saved a lot of pocket money, so that I could make a hefty recharge in my phone, thereby enabling us to have a good time on phone. (Meetings were still unthinkable for both of us). As I was busy in these preparations, at the same time, he got busy into the preparations for his first ‘Club Day’. Till then, a used to think about it as a normal Annual Day cum fest, but once the preparations started, I realised the seriousness of the issue. The numerous brainstorming sessions, play practice, song practice; the level of involvement of one and all at Jamalpur for celebrating their foundation day was unbelievable. It seemed as the whole place had woken up from its slumber. He was as busy (if not more) as the time prior to his club entry. Of course, his busy-ness can be attributed to his extreme cultural bent of mind, after all he had to sing, he had to act, he had to do anything and everything related to performing arts.

And as if it was not sufficient, this was the time for the annual sports tournaments as well. Wait, let me give some background information before I start about these tournaments. I am not too sure if I have mentioned it earlier, but we both are school friends, and ours was a very peculiar school in certain ways. At our alma-mater, 200% attention was given to the acads, and sufficient importance was attributed to cultural/ literary skills as well. However, on the sports front our school had little (tending to zero) to offer. In fact, except for the badminton matches (which were held inside a huge assembly hall), there wasn’t any outdoor sports activity at my school. To be more honest it didn’t even have a playground. Of course, boys being boys played cricket at every possible place, but I never thought it meant serious business for anyone. Many boys used to meet on Sundays at pre-designated open grounds of our city and used to cultivate their sporty instincts there. In short, I never knew that he was so good at so many games. Yeah, I was well aware about his liking for football, tennis and badminton (Cricket was never a game for him, cricket spelled passion in his mind), but I never knew (or imagined) him to be so good at these. Jamalpur was a blessing to him in terms of his sporting skills.

As these tournaments started, I got to know about how passionate and how good he was at all of these, esp. tennis and baddy and squash and TT :D. Honestly I don’t remember how many prizes he won in first year for sports alone, but I do remember him winning the running shield for cultural excellence (which he won consecutively for the next 3 years to come as well). During ‘our’ first club day, he sang a solo, took part in the play, in the Gym Odyssey amongst other activities. At the same time, on ‘our’ first valentine day, he sent me a handmade card and a CD (with a song written and sung by him just for me). I am still amazed at how he managed to juggle his time so well then, given the fact that he was a firstie then, the working class people of Gymkhana (Sorry seniors, no offence intended :P).

I think I should elaborate on the cultural programs of Club Day a little. The play, I have referred to twice in the above paragraphs was not executed in any ‘nausikhiya’ amateur manner. Refraining to comment on the story, all I would like to say is that whole script was full of wonderful punches and PJs. The play was not performed directly on stage, I mean the microphones at stage were dummy, and the play was enacted in a room turned into a recording studio, and the whole script was pre-recorded and well edited. Only the enacting part was done on stage. See, I said na Club Day means serious business for these people :D Also another act which needs a special mention over here is the Gym Odyssey, till date it remains to be one of my favourites. It is a shadow act performed by the Gymmies on a pre-recorded script, describing all the aspects of life of a Gymmie at Jamalpur. This script was drafted by some Gymmies ten year his senior. Later when I received a copy of the song, the 40 min long audio of the play and the soundtrack of the Gym Odyssey, I could not stop marvelling at the high standards of the Club Day.

The first club day left a deep impression on me, and prepared me (somewhat) for the future ones to come. I can't claim that after experiencing the first C'Day, I stopped bothering him about not giving me enough time; in fact as time passed, I have troubled him more n more about this 'time' issue. However, "our" first club day was a trend setter for the ones to come. It has been an essential part of my grooming pertaining to the customs and traditions of the Gym. Last but not the least, ever since "our" first club day, I have been dreaming of the time, when I will be able to come out of my invisiblilty cloak and shall be able to officially visit Jamalpur, and if possible attend a Club Day :D

Courting a Gymmie – Part 2

The basics

My first impression of the gymkhana was of a place where he lived in a room having dimensions 20’ x 20’ x 20’. This is how he had described it to me in one of his earliest letters from Jamalpur; however description of the place was even more interesting. I vividly remember him calling Jamalpur a गांव/कस्बा/town, just that he couldn’t make up his mind what was it resembling more. Before, he was leaving for Jamalpur (the same time when we had just started our life as a couple); he had told me that once there, he will tell me about the possible modes of communication we might look forward to. So after he left, I was left in anticipation and preparing myself for the worst, I had convinced myself that at least I shall receive a letter/ phone call at some convenient time.

It was three weeks after he had been there, that I received a phone call from a number starting 06344- and I just can’t express my happiness. He hurriedly gave me some basic info and assured me that he was the fittest among his batch-mates. Of course, coming from a regular engineering college, I started imagining the variations of ragging and feared the worst. However, after a few more days of such anxiety, he found out that he could afford to give me a call every week and gradually I got convinced that things were not as bad as I had imagined them to be. To say the least, I was not really able to comprehend the kind of situation he was in. The customs n ways which he used to describe briefly, were many times totally beyond my understanding and imagination.

I can recall the day when he had called to tell me that ‘kal hamari club entry ho gayi’. Once again I was perplexed at this phrase. I tried correlating it to a normal Fresher’s party and due to our limited time on phone, he said that it was something similar to that and that he would get into the details later. Of course with passage of time, I came to understand the essence (not fully though :P) of a variety of such terms; Club-entry, FLS, UNIT, VL, ‘faanki’ and ‘pail’ and of course CLUB DAY.

After his stint at Jamalpur started, we met for the first time in October during DP break. (And this was the first time when I didn’t feel irritated at my college authorities for giving us a break at DP and not Diwali). During this meeting, I actually realised the meaning of what he meant by saying that he was the fittest of all among his batchmates. I could not believe my eyes, when I noticed that he was laming slightly as we went on a walk. During that trip, he told me many a things about Jamalpur, Gymkhana, IRIMEE and the life he had over there. And a lot of it was quite incredible. My initial reaction was of shock and disbelief, but, since he seemed happy and well adjusted in that environment, I was also somewhat relaxed.

During our conversations, he told me about the ‘Club Day’ and more importantly the fact that it is celebrated every year on the 14th of February. (I guess it must be the only celebration on this particular day which goes unopposed by the people of India at large). Since we had started our official courtship after February, and given the fact that I was full of a college girl’s romantic notions, I didn’t really understand the implications of ‘the club day’ then. Seriously, till date, at times I question that whether it is a practical joke played by destiny on all of us girls who ever thought of (or actually did, like me) courting a Gymmie. It has been almost 6 years of our courtship and we are yet to celebrate a V-day.

As time passed, the culture and traditions of Gymkhana began to unfold before me. I was looking at the complete scenario through his eyes. It was like a fort with an invisible boundary wall and I was peeping inside from the other side of it, with my face pressed hard against it. Once the DP vacations were over and both of us were back at our hostels, things became somewhat relaxed (just slightly so). Actually, things had not changed as such, just that being humans we had got accustomed to the situations.

His life had fallen into a routine and I had subconsciously started following the same :P (we girls are so adjusting na :P). A regular day started with his rushing to IRIMEE in the morning for assembly, followed by some or the other method to pass time. Lunch time was around 1330 and the most happening and fixed routine was of evening which started with tea (which he never took and always preferred Nimbu Paani) and was followed by sports session (which lasted up to dinner time). Dinner was followed by sessions of pail. On a normal day, he used to get free at max by 2330. With time, the frequency and duration of our calls increased. I started completing all my chores before I expected him to return from his dinner and subsequent sessions. I had found out some of the best potholes in my hostel and had also developed the skill to talk very softly on phone, so much so that even a person standing right next to me might not realise whether I was speaking at all.

Though we had been the best of friends since school time, yet we always had so much to say, to discuss, to share and to recount. Honestly speaking, during my four years at college, my best moments were those which I spent conversing with him. As times passed our phone calls were no longer a mere mode of communication for us, it became the method by the virtue of which we spent time with each other.

I would like to describe one such call over here. We had been talking about our initial years when we were toddlers and were busy recounting interesting anecdotes from the past. I can’t explain how exactly did it happen, but soon we were discussing ABCD and what words were associated with these alphabets in the prep standard books. We were doing well and were able to recount almost all of it except T. We thought hard but it didn’t solve any purpose. Next day while in conversation with a batchmate, he brought up this highly disturbing issue and as fate would have it, the dear batchmate came to our rescue and told us that T was for Tea Pot. Now, please don’t judge us and our conversations on the basis of this sample. It’s just that this sample was simple and comic enough to be shared on a public forum :D.

Courting a Gymmie – Part I

Innumerable times, my friends have patiently heard me talk about him and his Jamalpur connection for hours at length. However, I really doubt if they were ever able to comprehend me fully. The following is the first in the series of articles titled 'Courting a Gymmie'. This series is intended at expressing the different ways in which 'our' life has been affected by two events which started with a gap of just a month.
Happy reading to all of you !
Happy writing to me !
Happy life to both of us !

Preface

Well, first things first. I really don't know if I am authorized to write what I am about to. Of course, we live in a democracy with right to speech being a prominent fundamental right, but what I am about to pen down has a very deep connection with an elite group of people who take great pride in the fact that they had to clear UPSC to be a part of it. This group has such privileged membership that after an existence of more than 80 years, their membership has only recently crossed the 1000 mark. They are elite enough that they have a culture of their own; protocols which are not easily understood by the ordinary janta.

The question is that how did I get associated with these high class achievers. Actually, one member of this group has touched my life in ways I can only feel. And since this group has been an integral part of his life since last six years, it became mine as well. I am a third party, invisible observer to all the major activities of these people, their ways, their ideas, their cult as a whole. The one thing which gives me a slight feel good factor and keeps me from feeling left out while being there in an invisible way, without registering my presence, is the fact that I came into his life before this culture did, even though the time gap was only a month (if we go by the official figures). And of course, kudos to him for taking me along as a part of his ownself, when he entered this new world. To be frank, till date I feel somewhat awed by these people and their ways.

To cut the foreword short, this article is about looking at this different world from the other side of the glass. The purpose of this article is to reveal and express how this group called SCA, the life being lived at JMP and the people called Gymmies (and later on SAMs) has affected me;- an ordinary girl with nothing extraordinary to boast about.

But before I start, my sincere apologies to one and all who might feel offended by anything written here or may be at my mere impudence to write at all about something that’s totally theirs. Dear all, it is not at all intended to do any dishonour to any of you or the culture of Jamalpur Gymkhana.

My thought process :D

Two of my close friends have started a war of sorts. They have been calling each other COLOURS. It started with a very purple story, then went on to become yellow and pink; and the latest colours to have made to their list is black and blue. Vaise as I am writing, who knows the list might have been updated once again.

Well this colourful fight just set me thinking about what colours I would associate with the people / situations around me. Of course, my first thought was of Aks. Aks for me spells out all the bright n beautiful colours; everything signifying happiness and security; love and affection; stability and maturity; sharing and caring and of course lots of fun……but to replace such feelings by a single colour……..its not possible……after all a colour is just that – it’s a colour………..and a person is much more than that…………I might be very sweet and thoughtful towards certain people under certain circumstances and at the same time I might be very harsh and strict in totally different conditions….. Now the person who is happy with my behavior might just call me a bright yellow or a vibrant orange, but the person who has just been on the receiving end of my ‘jhaad’ will not be able to associate me with any colour other than gloomy grey or may be even black.

The above paragraph has set me thinking on an altogether different path. Well this is something I love the most about a human mind. The thought process and the ‘chain of thoughts’ is simply amazing. One thought leads to another and without our realizing, it changes drastically to an absolutely different subject. The best part about this process is that at the end of it when we finally come out of our thought-trance, we realize where we started and where we finally are, and then we start back tracing our mind. By the time we finally reach the first block of the loop, we realize that it has been a very interesting path that our mind has tread in a very short time.

The process I just described is so similar to life itself. Every time we reach a cross road or a fork in life, knowingly or unknowingly we chose one path over the rest and move on to confront yet another choice. We move on and on this way and ultimately when we finally have enough time to rest and retrospect, we realize that though we know where all we have made choices, but unlike the thought process, the loop seldom completes in life and rarely do we get a chance to come back to a crossroad and re-choose our path.

Oh my, what all have I written above, I started with something and have ended up somewhere totally unexpected. Actually this a major drawback of writing an article while sitting in office. The numbers of breaks are almost uncountable. When I started writing, I was in a light mood, having just read the excerpts of the colourful argument between my friends. And then my heart led me to think about my Aks and needless to say, I was on a totally different platter while thinking (and writing) about him. After that, a sudden phone call by the site contractor brought me back to the यथार्थ का धरातल and I realized the ground realities. Honestly, one trip to site (irrespective of its duration) is sufficient to destroy the entire feel good factor I might have developed by thinking happily throughout the day.

When I finally returned to my seat, I saw this article open and incomplete. When I started typing, all I could marvel at was how the human thought runs………..wild and weird………In a normal situation, the outcome would had been very different. Quite likely I wouldn’t have written this article at all, because although I decided to create my blog yesterday only, but that doesn’t mean that I started thinking/ writing from yesterday itself. But yes one honest confession from my side is that I didn’t write this article naturally. I often often have this urge to write/ express, but usually I allow it to die a natural death. However, today I decided to water this feeling and of course it provided me a nice way to kill some time in office :P. I guess all is well. Almost daily I have at least 1-2 ideas bubbling up in my mind and requesting me transform them into something more material. Its just that today I let that happen.

Rest is fine and mast, I have to pay yet another visit to my muddy site. I should get going in that case, but I just thought why I actually started this entry at all. Oh yeah after all two of my close friends were busy in a war of sorts. Thought process, you see is really amazing :D

A small step for the world, but a giant leap for me :D

A handful of friends had been recommending me to start blogging since a long time......but very frankly, I totally belong the old school of thought; pen n paper with lots free time and no disturbing element is what I need to express n vent out..........moreover, for me writing is more of a medium to express than communicate.....writing relaxes the mind and brings a lot more clarity in my thought...........

I started by writing diaries in '98. The diary writing spree went on for 5 yrs or so, after that I started writing letters to my someone special, and this somewhat replaced my diaries........plus life used to be comparatively simpler up till graduation........ However, ever since the professional life started, stress levels have reached a new definition altogether……….add to it the fact that there is hardly any leisure time at home……..as a consequence of such differences in the lifestyle then n now, I finally thought that maybe I should heed to the advices I have been receiving since long…….

So, here I am, trying my compatibility with this new world syndrome termed as blogging…………..

I guess it’s good enough a preface to whatever might follow later…………but all my dear readers, I would like to reiterate something I mentioned above, writing for me is more for myself than for my audience, hence please read it at your own risk n if after reaching the last sentence you feel like terming it as ‘chaat’; you are most welcome to your opinion, just that it’s not going to affect the ‘chaat’ nature of my content as such :P (no offence intended)

My friends, I have made the first post, do wish me luck for future ones. Last but not the least, ALL THE BEST to all of you, happy reading and of course comment with utmost honesty……………………